Thursday, March 19, 2020

Look Up....Fear Not... I am with you

Look Up ....Psalm 121
Fear Not....Psalm 46
I am with you....Psalm 91

    Its about 3 am and I am awake. As with many of you these uncertain days we can start to think ahead and that can cause us to ponder a little.  Dan and I have been working hard at ways to  simplify our life. We recently moved to an addition we built onto The North Place..... we were in the process of selling the home place to David...we were in the process of selling Dan's moms apartment ..... we were in the process of going thru insurances  and simplifying those things....... we were in the process of making farming decisions as we are getting older and the small family farms are struggling............we were in the process of making retirement plans and what that could look like........we were in the process of helping David turn the basement of his house into an apartment. We had a plan, we were both willing to  work hard  and we were both willing to do what ever it took to carry out this plan  of OURS. And then God said STOP.
    Last Friday morning Dan came home from work shortly after he left. He had to tell me that Trans ova had lay offs and he  he was one of them  along with many others. Dan loved his job there, he loves his team there,( I love his team there,) he loved his flexibility there. He loved the way they all pitched in to help each other and work together. We depended on his paycheck to help support our family and all the ways were were trying to make positive  changes in our life, and we depend on health insurance as I continue to fight serious health issues. Friday we did not panic. I was so proud of Dan for all the ways he handled everything. We had devotions like we normally do, we prayed and we both knew that we needed to TRUST because God's plans and control are much better than our own and that he walks beside us  thru both the good times and the bad.
     Saturday the whole corona virus precautions hit pretty hard.  We realized that yes this was going to be for real and it was going to affect all of us in some way.  The devil started working pretty hard here in my little house.  We were both still in shock over the job loss, we had concerns for my Mom as her assisted living place closed the doors, Aria continues to have seizures and goes back to Mayo in a few weeks, Kycie was scheduled to have tonsils out, its a year this week that Dan's mom passed away, schools shut down, people were going crazy buying supplies and then the  fear and worry of financial implications  and bills to pay and the list went on filling my thoughts. All these thoughts and panic lasted less than five minutes and then a couple hours later they lasted another 5 minutes and that seemed to continue through the whole day. And then the phone started ringing with cancellations  or concerns for reservations at The North Place..... that's our second income. Ok.... I still believe God walks beside me and I know HIS plan is much better than my own. I am not writing this because I want a pity party. I am writing this because each one of us can just fill in their own story, their own thoughts, their own panic and concern.
     Sunday morning I needed church and Pastor Mike started the service with these three things.... Look UP......Fear Not... and ...I am with you..... from the Psalms.  I have found these three things so valuable this week ! I feel that Facebook  has been filled with positive and uplifting things, encouragement and prayers. Our  leaders are  praying and encouraging prayer. People are reaching out to each other in kindness and love.  Families are home, spending time together, sitting around the table for dinner.I have prayed for ways to simplify my life and not be so crazy busy all the time. Well God  said STOP... He said Look UP ...  He said Fear Not.... He said  I am with you. He said ....My Plans are way better than yours..... He said ...Trust Me! Tonight as  I sit in the darkness of the night, I hear the rain falling on the rooftop, its quiet and my heart feels at peace knowing I have a God who is greater than all of our circumstances. Join me in prayer for our nation, our leaders , our families , our health care providers, our teachers, our students, our small business' and those that don't have the comfort that God reigns over all of this!

PS  I'm sure that I myself along with all of you still have hard days ahead and I may have more than 5 minutes of panic and worry every couple hours. There were a couple times today that I felt close to the edge of falling apart. Pray for strength for each other, your kids and your spouse. Pray for yourself , pray that God stays close to you so others can see HIM thru you.
        

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